tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-46900586471850320562024-03-19T12:48:55.764-07:00My Early Twenties AngstI thought this angst would be over in college. I was wrong.BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-70214665327149342102016-04-27T20:13:00.001-07:002016-04-27T20:13:21.801-07:00Project #4 "Recipe: Betty Crocker's Mac & Cheese" aka The Day I Became Paula Deen's Wet Dream (without being racist)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-size: large;">PROJECT #4 "RECIPE"</span></b></div>
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I...absolutely loved this piece. I think this is one of my best pieces yet. (Or should I say one of my <i>butter</i> pieces.) It was disgusting and awful and cold and I was naked and I still smell like butter; but I also think that it was a really interesting endurance piece.<br />
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I am not sure where this piece came from. That's a lie. It came from inspiration from Yoko Ono's Instruction pieces, and the way that the Fluxus workbook is written. Performance art with the intention of being re-performed under new interpretation of the artist. I guess that from there I though, what if someone reinterpreted how a recipe was supposed to be made. I like to live with absurdity, so I was like, what if this reinterpretation was more than the improvisations and changes that good cook makes to a recipe. What if this recipe was reinterpreted in a ridiculous way. Originally I thought about what was going on campus and how mad I was that racism and harassment was still alive. And how much I wanted to do something that would make change happen. Honestly, as a Chinese man, I'm tired of conversation. I'm ready for action. I, and other people of color, can't sit around and converse while we wait for change. If we wait, we could be next. And so I wanted to do a piece that was about that. I thought originally about reading a poem/speaking thoughts and phrases that I and other people had while food was thrown around me or at me--forcing me to stop or to shut up. Or keep going, and endure the onslaught. And in a lot of ways, that lived on into the final copy; except that this piece lives in food.<br />
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Food is super important to me. As I wrote in my stream of consciousness, I pretty much grew up in the family kitchen learning from my mother and father. My mother, who was raised by her grandmother, with culture of the 50s, and this was then passed down to me. The culture of the 50s is often what is used to define what it means to be American; and so I feel as though this could also represent the struggles of a person of color--to aspire to and live in the aesthetic of an era that was not good for them at all. It was a horrible era to be a woman as well. Really, the 50s were only good if you were a straight white man, and even then....why do we romanticize the 50s so much? Anyways, Betty Crocker's cookbook was first published in 1951; and I remember my mom using it for plenty of recipes; especially the Mac and Cheese recipe that we would doctor up into a Fielder Wong family original. And Mac and Cheese is the quintessential American comfort food!<br />
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I'm constantly in a struggle between what my identity is. To be honest, I would love to say that I'm an American. I'm proud to be in America, most of the time. But being an American doesn't just mean a person who is from America. It has connotations. Either I'm supposed to be white, or it means I'm supposed to be like the radical right. As a gay Chinese man; I'm neither of these things. (Okay, okay so being gay means I could be radical right. But I'm not. I'm more independent.) In some cases, it's offensive, because I'm not a certain percentage Native American--even though I was raised here, this land and this culture is all I know. Sure, my family is from Germany, but that's Germany before the American Revolution. And my great-Grandmother was Cherokee--she chose to hide it and leave it behind in order to move up in society. So I'm not going to claim it. And I'm Chinese; but I don't exactly fit in with the Chinese students because I don't have the same experiences as they do. Not to mention, my father is extremely Americanized, he came over when he was quite young. In a divisive society, I don't belong.<br />
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So this piece is supposed to be a reflection of that. Where am I? How do I belong? Amanda represents my white/German half, and Lily represents my Chinese half. The struggle is manifested in the attempt to read this recipe and maintain it without breaking down while they 'make' mac and cheese out of me.<br />
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I think that the piece could have taken longer; if Amanda and Lily had felt more comfortable using all of the butter--keeping it to two sticks--and buttered all of me while I continued reading the recipe over and over again. An option could be reading the instructions as they got to the ingredient, but I felt like that was too rehearsed and theatrical, the continuous sound from my mouth meant that I had something to struggle with, keeping my voice regular and stoic. As you see in the video, I wasn't able to keep my endurance; there were a few times that I wanted to laugh and had to choke down the instinct and then when the milk was poured, I started to shiver and my voice broke. Personally, I'm okay with the imperfection and the way that my voice broke. I think that it made the piece stronger, and gave the audience something to relate with. In a way, this piece about a food that should be comforting from a cookbook that is often synonymous with motherhood and nurturing became a piece about torture and endurance. And I like that. I like that the audience got to watch me go through torture and got to watch me struggle and endure.<br />
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Maybe I should try my hand at more endurance pieces in the future.<br />
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I also really like the idea of Amanda and Lily in all black with aprons, or dressed like Betty Crocker/women from the 50s. The plan was to have them in all black, but we failed to synchronize watches on when we actually were going to present. Oh well, live and learn.<br />
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<br />BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-1683381820422568732016-04-26T20:51:00.002-07:002016-04-27T12:52:05.552-07:00Waiting on a ZIP File to Download a.k.a. BRAIN DROPPINGSSo I'm sitting in the Academic Technology Studio, and all that's going through my head right now is a combination of Taylor Swift's "Welcome To New York" and Beyonce's "Formation" (actually now that I've written that down, toss My Chemical Romance's "Welcome to the Black Parade").<br />
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It may seem kind of strange that I'm sitting here letting songs go through my head, but I have to just sit here. Because I'm waiting for the videos that I shot to download to the computer so I can edit them together in Premier. Which is one beautiful, sexy program. I love working with Premier. I've figured out how to make it do what I want it to do. (Now that I've written that down, it'll start acting up on me and I'll have to sweet talk my way back into it's good graces.)<br />
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I'm not really sure what I'm saying right now, really I just wanted to get a blog post on my blog; and yeah, it's not the Mac and Cheese blog post--IT'S COMING, I SWEAR. But it's something. It's a human post. There's been a few human posts on other student's blogs, so...why not mine? The truth is that I'm a writer. I love to write and tell story and I have a lot of thoughts and I like making people listen to them.<br />
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Correction. I like pretending that people like to hear my thoughts. Regardless, I have a lot of thoughts and it's nice to put them down. Even the awful judgement thoughts that I have and I WILL NOT BE ASHAMED OF THEM BECAUSE EVERYONE IS JUDGMENTAL. YOU CANNOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE. And just because I'm judging you doesn't mean you should take me seriously. Not everyone has taste. Except for me. I have amazing taste. I'm like a goddamn designer chef with these tastebuds.<br />
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Sorry, my word vomit gets hella off-topic sometimes. (Also, by the way HELLA is HELLA A WORD. PARTY ON THE WEST COAST. WE SUCCEEDED IN MAKING A SLANG WORD HAPPEN. FETCH IS NEXT ON THE LIST.) Speaking of getting back on topic; "Welcome to New York" actually started playing while my iPad was on shuffle and then moved to "Formation. So that's nice. Thank you fate and chances and whatever else I should thank for randomness.<br />
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Brains are super weird. Do you ever get the urge to scream random things out of nowhere? Not like in a Tourette's way but in a like "BUSH DID 9/11" or "SOMETIMES I WISH I WAS A MANTIS SHRIMP WHICH IS MY FAVORITE SHRIMP NOT LIKE ANY OF YOU FUCKS CARE." Not that <i>I've</i> ever wanted to scream those things. Asking for a friend. More often than not I really want to scream things like "I HATE WHEN EVERYONE IS GIVING OUT COMPLIMENTS AND I DON'T GET ANY REAL ONES." or "I FAKE MY SELF-CONFIDENCE AND I ACTUALLY NEED A LOT OF ATTENTION." or "ONE TIME IN THIRD GRADE I PEED ON A DEAD RACCOON AND THE NEXT TIME MY MOM ASKED ME A QUESTION I CRIED AND BLAMED MY BEST FRIEND. SHE STILL DOESN'T KNOW WHY I CRIED OR WHY I WAS BLAMING HIM." Also, the nice thing about being humorous <i>is that you don't know how much of this is real.</i> And I'm not telling you. (Hint: Truth is stranger than fiction.) Sometimes I just want to scream. Continuously. And just scream and scream and scream.<br />
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I used to think maybe I was a banshee. I am partially psychic. One time I had a dream that my exe got hit by a car; but that's a story for another day. Anyways, so I used to think I was a banshee because sometimes I just get this overbearing urge to shriek and scream. And then like...someone would die, or get hurt. And my lizard brain would go "OOH. PATTERN. YOU CAUSED THIS. YOU COULD HAVE FORETOLD THIS." And fucked up!me would be like "Oh shit, lizard brain you're totally right, I'm horrible!" Anyways, I'm probably not really a banshee and I probably just have a lot of stress and tension that my brain would like to release in the form of a high drama fashion but the point is I used to think I was because I thought I had seen a pattern where there wasn't. It was bullshit.<br />
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Beyonce's line "you know that bitch when you call all this conversation," in 'Formation' is literally SO DELICIOUS and I LOVE IT because as a person of color (Chinese) I AM SO TIRED OF 'CONVERSATION.' I want action. I want to know that I'm safe on this campus and that harassment and racism is being stopped. I want to know that my other POC brothers and sisters are safe and even the POC that I don't claim as family are safe. But, I'm on a mostly white campus so, we only have conversation and we only do enough to ease the white guilt. Hey, I'm half-white. I half get it. (pst, guess which half is white? It's the left half.)<br />
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Growing up my mom and I used to watch <i>Ghost Whisperer</i> on CBS and I loved that shit. There's no story here. I just really loved a primetime supernatural soap opera starring Jennifer Love Hewitt. (Bruh, I wanted to BE Jennifer Love Hewitt/Melinda Gordon. This is probably where my fascination with firefighters and other men in uniform came from. I also wanted to have a business in this romanticized hipster gentrified small town. Man, I was GAYAF as a kid.)<br />
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Bruh, this file is taking forever and I have Phase 5! tonight. Why does the internet SUCK so bad sometimes? <i>*cries dramatic tears of blood* </i>Okay, so now "Warm Blood" by Carly Rae Jepsen from E•MO•TION is playing and it's literally SUCH a bop. I know, I know what you're thinking. <i>"Carly Rae Jepsen? Isn't that the girl who wrote Call Me Maybe?"</i> And yes. It is. And clearly, you should be able to tell from Call Me Maybe that E•MO•TION IS LITERALLY AMAZING. But if you didn't take Call Me Maybe seriously (which you should have), you need to talk E•MO•TION seriously. Think 90s Pop, but like written nowadays and like think fun pop music that makes you want to dance in your underwear but also get your underwear make-out grind on; and that's what you get with E•MO•TION. It's literally an album of super fun pop music that is unapologetically reminiscent of the 90s. <i>(Another SUPER GOOD pop album is All I Need by Foxes.)</i><br />
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I STILL HAVE 7 GODDAMN MINUTES ON THIS DOWNLOAD AND I AM SO MAD. LITERAL MADNESS RIGHT NOW. LITERAL MADNESS. Or is it sadness? I don't even know anymore. Do you ever look at someone and just go...I want to bang you and make out with you? But you don't know why you want to bang and/or make out with them, because they aren't typically your type? And it's like is this Cornell Goggles am I desperate or am I actually attracted to you? And is it still actual attraction if it's based on either of these things? And then you're just like bruh how do I even GET THE DIGITS i don't KNOW HOW TO FLIRT i am a SMALL GAY who has never DONE THIS BEFORE because NOBODY EVER LIKES me and i don't mean like as in attraction i literally mean I REPULSE EVERY HUMAN BEING also i can totally do ONLINE HOOK-UPS but what ARE IRL FLIRTING AND TALKING LIKE and I DON'T GET IT. I DON'T UNDERSTAND. Educate me world! Teach me! This is me banging metaphorical pots together and screaming at the universe HELLO I NEED TO LEARN HOW TO FLIRT AND HAVE IRL RELATIONS WITH MENFOLK SO IF YOU COULD SEND ME A FEW GAY/BI/?? GUYS THAT ARE ATTRACTED TO LUMPY DORKY WHASIANS FROM CALIFORNIA THAT WOULD BE GR9. also I have 3 FUCKIN minutes left on the download.<br />
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I am still waiting. w a i t i n g. whatever happened to "Party In The USA" Miley? Not that current Miley is bad and that she shouldn't do her own thing. She should be herself. But I wonder if there's an alternate universe where "PITU"!Miley was the real Miley and so she kept up doing pop crap like that. What would our world be like? What would life be like? Where would music be? Would Miley and Ke$ha have done something together? I miss Ke$ha. Like a lot. Ke$ha just wanted to make fun music that we could play at parties and get crunk to. Ke$ha made music that made dancing fun. She made music that was just happy. And fun.<br />
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AND MY DOWNLOAD IS DONE. halle-fucking-lujah.<br />
<br />BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-13266736509691394762016-04-26T12:12:00.001-07:002016-04-27T20:19:55.936-07:00Project #3 "Cake" aka THEY SCREAM AT OWN CAKE<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-size: large;">PROJECT #3 "CAKE"</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>"Cake" Studio Version</b></span></div>
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This piece was a lot of fun to do. When the idea of incongruous sound was placed in our minds, I started to ruminate over what our project could be. My first thought was Marina Abramovic and Ulay's AAAAA-AAAAA piece, and wanted to feature the contrast between screaming and whispering. Initially, I went to Lily with the idea of one artist opening their mouth to scream, but the other artist vocalizes the whispering/murmuring. Then the whispering/murmuring artist opens their mouth to whisper and the other artist begins to scream. The incongruous sound was the wrong sound coming out of each other.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Troublemaker Twins</td></tr>
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Lily however wanted to do something with food--and that gave me more ideas about being more and more absurd. Lily wanted cake. I love cake. And I loved the idea of getting a sheet cake with white frosting and pretty little flowers on it. So together we came up with the idea of the cake being consumed savagely by Lily while I play the voice of the cake and shriek in pain and torture. Our absurdity and incongruous sound was personifying the cake and giving it life.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He scream. So much scream. :/</td></tr>
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I am a big spectacle/aesthetic artist; so I was hoping to buy a cake. But I'm also a college student and I do not have the funds to invest in a cake to destroy--and then buy a second for a video. So we chose to bake a simple cake and let the simplicity be in and of itself.<br />
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I am really happy with how the performance came together. If I could financed by someone to build a set with a giant flag behind us, or if we could just be financed for pretty, pre-made sheet cakes, and not have to bake the cakes ourselves, I would be just fine with that. If we could have gotten someone to lead the audience in, I think it would have been more effective--I would have walked in with the audience like an audience plant. The mirror didn't get noticed, but I was hoping to place it so that the audience could see themselves and be made complicit in the action of Lily eating this cake. For me this piece is a lot about body issues, and I liked the explanation that I was Lily's internal monologue as she forced herself to eat this cake. Holding the audience--society--responsible for these body issues and food issues I think makes them think and reconsider things.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Residue ... aka The Corpse</td></tr>
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For the reshot video--the direct to video performance, I wanted to refocus the performance piece on Lily. It is about her eating the cake. The video needed some kind of lead-in, so I thought about using instrumental music from television. There's a magical element to the idea of personifying a cake, so I suppose Bewitched popped into my head from that. I'm living in the 50's and 60's right now with my Mac and Cheese piece, so maybe it grew off of that. Either way, the tunes give a carefree vibe lovely vibe that then is contrasted by the constant screaming and savagery of Lily's attacks on the cake. Placing the music at the end gave me a lead out, since I ran out of screaming track; and also created a fun montage that amped up the absurdity. I'm really pleased with the video. As someone who likes to work with high spectacle and visual, I wish I could have set the videos in a more vivid and vibrant location. Working with the idea that my screaming was the internal monologue of Lily, I wanted to contrast the two of us. I thought about placing her outside on a park bench surrounded by green, while I was trapped inside, in a white room--or even in a mechanical area underneath Kimmel Stage. But Lily wanted to make sure we kept simplicity in mind, and with such a short deadline I had to agree. The contrast comes in the way that I'm backed into a corner and wearing a black shirt, while Lily is just up against a white wall, with plenty of room and wearing a white shirt. Enjoy the reshot version! And watch it next to the live for some great comparisons!</div>
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<b><i>edit: Wednesday April 27 @ 10:20pm VIDEO uploaded w/ commentary.</i></b></div>
BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-32265221949170830692016-04-24T21:03:00.000-07:002016-04-26T20:57:42.820-07:00Reading Response<div>
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<li class="li1"><span class="s1"></span><span class="s2">Futurism was an anti-art response to traditional art, and was conceived with the idea of acting against the notions that capital “A” art carried. The futurists also wanted to provoke their audiences to make them angry and to respond so that they would think and consider what the Futurists were making and why it might matter. This was not art that was straight forward and easy to understand. Dada took these ideas of going against Art and making the audience think and further consider what was in front of them; and focused more on the art that they were creating in performance—less focus on written manifesto. The Dadaists would open clubs, cabarets, and galleries and feature performance of some kind for their audiences. These performances in turn would provoke the audiences and make them respond in kind—usually in frustration in anger. And while these spaces would close, the Dadaists would move on to new cities and open new acts to be seen. They continued the idea of improvisation and minimal rehearsal. Their ideas acted less against the traditional art form and more against the obscenity and censorship laws that were created by those in government. Movements in the 30s and 60s seemed to borrow from the notion of art as accessible and as a way to accentuate the daily action or things from daily life along with stripping away the pretentiousness and spectacle that continued to be a part of traditional mainstream art. I found it interesting the way Black Mountain College had a group of artists that looked at theatre for it’s fundamental phenomena and not the contemporary value that it carried; along with John Cage’s usage of the ordinary sound and noises that we as people usually take for granted and forget to pay attention to.</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s3"></span><span class="s2">It seems to me that these artists all used their bodies because it’s what they had. Performance art to me is about simplicity and doing an action that you as an artist are committed to. Every single performance that we have studied and seen so far required a level of commitment—especially Marina Abramovic’s endurance pieces, along with Madison’s Pretty Woman piece. These pieces ask so much of the performer that it makes sense for them to be using their bodies as opposed to using someone else’s. It also means that they, as the artist, are carrying story in their choice of ‘sacrifice’ and of action. If their main goal was to make people think by creating striking images and actions that would cause immediate reactions and later carry in the minds of people; then the body makes sense. If the person whose name is on the exhibit—the artist—is doing the creating the striking image in front of you or doing the action, then as an audience, it carries the most weight. The audience will see it, feel it, and receive it.</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s3"></span><span class="s2">Performance art is a weird amalgamation of theatre and painting/sculpture/etc. However, it did not exist as a term/was defined until more recently. Looking back, we can apply the term performance art to the piece that were made and performed.</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s3"></span><span class="s2">Conceptual art is art where the ideas of the piece are the focus rather than tradition and material.</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s3"></span><span class="s2">Aesthetics can be included in performance art and conceptual art. However, it is not the focus and reason for the existence of the art form. Therefore, conceptual art serves as a rebellion to the aestheticism because it doesn’t exist for aesthetics. I believe this rebellion happened because “art for art’s sake” and aestheticism started to hold a higher weight than the ideas and meaning behind the art. The conceptual artists wanted to focus on ideas and meaning; along with making sure that their art was available and open for the public to view and understand.</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s3"></span><span class="s2">Performance art is really hard to appreciate and understand. It isn’t theatre and it’s different than the art that we’ve accepted and claim to understand.</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s3"></span><span class="s2">A “Happening” indicated that something was going to ‘happen’ or occur in front of the audience. It harkened to the spontaneity and unpredictability of what was going to happen. It wasn’t a show so much as an event that was going to occur—rehearsal was minimal and there was a great amount of chance.</span></li>
<li class="li1"><span class="s3"></span><span class="s2">Chance operations mean that no two performances will ever be exactly the same. There is some part of the piece that is ensured to different or change based on a variable as set or planned by the artist. This was extremely important for John Cage because it departed from the traditional music tradition of having planned and exact musical scores. Cage wanted to find the beauty in the ordinary—in the random sounds that surround us always. These sounds are unplanned and don’t always fall into a perfect pattern. However, the beauty of the human brain is that a performance will always be seen as perfect and planned, because we find the patterns or we perceive what we think we see.</span></li>
</ul>
BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-86804196280269570882016-04-19T12:43:00.000-07:002016-04-26T21:27:26.937-07:00Project #2 "Train/Niart" aka Finally Getting to Work With QUEEN Amanda<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>PROJECT #2 "TRAIN/NIART"</b></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_4cISOpKaaarh2TZVCinXvcfVfYRIkCQMB4awoUhaTVRPJWZRxUuclZs7q9YTdTt6qSymOJDoYJuwbDCEKGDoHgKMMSqzQV-RcI7PiJNc5cqC-_KvDjQ4DeUDHitRyz5bPmKCDVf_vZh3/s1600/IMG_8198.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_4cISOpKaaarh2TZVCinXvcfVfYRIkCQMB4awoUhaTVRPJWZRxUuclZs7q9YTdTt6qSymOJDoYJuwbDCEKGDoHgKMMSqzQV-RcI7PiJNc5cqC-_KvDjQ4DeUDHitRyz5bPmKCDVf_vZh3/s320/IMG_8198.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">the train as it came at us</td></tr>
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Okay, so story time. Once upon a time, a small (not really) asian gay prince from California was whisked off to a magical liberal arts castle in the Midwest where he was inducted into a cult. During his induction, he met a fair knight from Wisconsin who had proven herself in comedy and a regal Queen from the provinces of Oregon.<br />
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Okay, this story is not going anywhere and I'm having the hardest time actually bringing it to where I want to be; so I'm going to TL;DR it. Amanda and I met last year in our First Year Seminar. We're both Theatre people and we lived in the same building and we had the same advisor. And we had friends named Angie and Anna. Together we were Amanda, Benjamin, Anna, and Angie: ABAA. (A names can be rearranged at will.) However, Angie transferred out of Cornell and Anna was busy with her comedy improv group. Eventually we all fell apart. I haven't really gotten to work with or hang out with Amanda this past school year. When Amanda texted me and was like "Do you want to work together on the next project. I have an idea." My first response was "Yes." Actually it was "YES. PLEASE THANK YOU." Well, actually my first response was unintelligible squealing and I grabbed the person next to me and squeezed their arm really hard. Anna wasn't very pleased. And then I very calmly texted back, "Yes." Amanda had an idea and I was SUPER EXCITED TO WORK WITH HER BECAUSE THIS WAS GODDAMN AMANDA BENTZ. Also she wanted to do something with trains and let's be real. Trainz r kool yo.<br />
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Sorry to go super hip on ya'll, what I said was "trains are cool, my dear friends and homies."<br />
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Amanda wanted to go out to the train bridge and record the train passing under us. On Sunday was my 10/12 rehearsal for <i>Those That Fall</i>; which is a fancy way of saying we rehearse the show for 12 hours with a brief 2 hour break for dinner. Thankfully rehearsal ended early, so Amanda and i were able to meet around 10. At 10 we went down to the train bridge and as we walked up to the bridge, the far off sounds of the train began to sound. Amanda hurriedly began to sprint to the bridge shouting at me to "SHH SHH SHH!" As she set up the recorder I lay on the bridge and stared up at the stairs listening to the frogs and night critters. Amanda lay next to me and we allowed the train to pass under us and feel the vibration of the train. That done, Amanda and i discussed our plan. On the walk to the bridge we had experienced and tossed out ideas for performance; and from these we were able to solidify our idea. We were going to play this sound forwards and in reverse at the same time while being present for each other.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYFf8WxW36NNQ0bmgKRjOMBzXY_Awmi4rfSvMaWLMpYtO0GYvVW5_iOcD6rHRXZ3-lblv0ADfhTfzwfaJT1IHh2X8EerhZidHGuqd3-E1afrw_cfFgCHPyKlwX1ln6IQe4Z4Qr5WxPHc4d/s1600/IMG_8199.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYFf8WxW36NNQ0bmgKRjOMBzXY_Awmi4rfSvMaWLMpYtO0GYvVW5_iOcD6rHRXZ3-lblv0ADfhTfzwfaJT1IHh2X8EerhZidHGuqd3-E1afrw_cfFgCHPyKlwX1ln6IQe4Z4Qr5WxPHc4d/s320/IMG_8199.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">the train as it left us</td></tr>
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Amanda wrote our score and I played with the train audio to play it in reverse.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe5kq2zaqMxRB0K5e74IUMKWxSvOcW-wDljr5VvbxdQHWd9IJ2XlpeAFBJmKtnf_lTiUpKSOGp-OHaCadg-QAiR9HBWfTcY9ju444idczO6P355ngQCiKA35VcTMShcjH6a81YH26zP2RM/s1600/IMG_2772.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe5kq2zaqMxRB0K5e74IUMKWxSvOcW-wDljr5VvbxdQHWd9IJ2XlpeAFBJmKtnf_lTiUpKSOGp-OHaCadg-QAiR9HBWfTcY9ju444idczO6P355ngQCiKA35VcTMShcjH6a81YH26zP2RM/s320/IMG_2772.jpeg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">our score</td></tr>
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I was pleased with how our performance came together; I liked how the sounds layered. To make the reversal stand out more, playing the sounds separately would bump up and give the audience a chance to really hear and listen to the differences in the train sounds. The light for me really replicated the way that the light of the train when it came at us.<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1NxPE8vHcgg/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/1NxPE8vHcgg?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe></div>
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The signs were a last minute decision. I felt like having a sign that said TRAIN and another that spelled it backwards, NIART; would be vaguely anti-art and super literal. I texted Amanda and she agreed that it was anti-art. They were not the focus for me; and i felt as though they could be an additional layer after--like residue. A part of the piece that may be missed in the performance and could be added into the memory of the performance as carried by the viewer.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQl7kdiUiPGu0dDmCUY4V_aDNaAFUB5RevxSUVtO5NZEWF-utPJZbeSo5wgYXdQUG0ox_fPpzDIVmo4eKoLMmZwhWMCngnNI2BsI8mZ95IPP_xuz1XyoWjLun3jxPcft3ZikhjZE4CNyNt/s1600/IMG_8207.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQl7kdiUiPGu0dDmCUY4V_aDNaAFUB5RevxSUVtO5NZEWF-utPJZbeSo5wgYXdQUG0ox_fPpzDIVmo4eKoLMmZwhWMCngnNI2BsI8mZ95IPP_xuz1XyoWjLun3jxPcft3ZikhjZE4CNyNt/s320/IMG_8207.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">very light, much drama</td></tr>
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For further performance, I'd like to put the artists in real chairs, not stools and I would like the placards to be around our necks and a little more elaborate. I also think that the artists should not come back after the performance. If possible, the audience should never see them together again. (Wow. I just realized I totally am being over dramatic about our friendship drifting apart. lol. This blog lives up to its title "My Twenty-Something Angst.")</div>
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<b><i>edit: VIDEO IS NOW POSTED.</i></b></div>
BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-73623608081402541172016-04-19T10:34:00.000-07:002016-04-26T20:57:55.722-07:00You Should Love Yoko Ono, and Here's Why.<br />
I'm not really going to do much writing here. Literally, I'm just copy and pasting my research lol #SorryNotSorry<br />
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YOKO ONO: Or as I like to say, Life Goals.<br />
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<ul>
<li>What did she do?</li>
<ul>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYJ3dPwa2tI">Cut Piece (1964)</a></li>
<li>Grapefruit (1964)</li>
<ul>
<li>A book of ‘instructions’ and things that read like poetry</li>
<li>Event</li>
<ul>
<li>“Two Telegrams”</li>
<ul>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">1) COMING THIS MORNING WITH SPRING AIR LOVE</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">2) CANNOT BELIEVE YOUR STUPIDITY BELIEVING I WOULD ACTUALLY COME STOP YOU KNOW I DONT HAVE A CENT STOP DONT CALL COLLECT ANYMORE PHONE BILL HOPELESSLY HIGH</span></li>
</ul>
<li>“ Announcement pieces”</li>
<ul>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">ANNOUNCEMENT PIECE 1</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Give death announcements each time you move instead of giving announcements of the change of address.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Do the same when you die.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">1962 Summer</span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: whitesmoke; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">ANNOUNCEMENT PIECE 2</span><span style="background-color: whitesmoke; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Give a moving announcement each time you die.</span><span style="background-color: whitesmoke; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">1963 Summer</span></li>
</ul>
</ul>
<li>Poetry</li>
<ul>
<li>“Touch Poem for a Group of People”</li>
<ul>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">TOUCH POEM FOR GROUP OF PEOPLE</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Touch each other.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">1963 winter</span></li>
</ul>
<li>“Closet Pieces”</li>
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<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">CLOSET PIECE I</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Think of a piece you lost.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Look for it in your closet.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">CLOSET PIECE II</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Put one memory into one half of your head.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Shut it off and forget it.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Let the other half of the brain long for it.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">CLOSET PIECE III</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Kill all the men you have slept with.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">Put the bones in a box and send it out into the sea with flowers.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif, sans; font-size: 13px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif , "sans"; font-size: 13px;">1964 spring</span></li>
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<li>A section of actually performed pieces.</li>
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<li>Cut (1964)</li>
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<li>Pieces of clothing are cut off of artist</li>
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<li>Beat (1965)</li>
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<li>Listen to a heartbeat</li>
<li>People coming on stage and lay on each other’s chest to listen</li>
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<li>Fly ()</li>
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<li>Everyone ‘flies’ in some way</li>
<li>Once performed where audience comes up on stage and jumps off of prepared ladders</li>
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<li>“The only sound that exists to me is the sound of the mind. My works are only to induce music in the mind of people.”</li>
<li>“The natural state of life and mind is complexity. At this point, what art can offer (if it can at all - to me it seems) is an absence of complexity, a vacuum through which you are led to a state of complete relaxation of mind. After that you may return to the complexity of life again, it may not be the same, or it may be, or you may never return, but that is your problem”</li>
<li>“People talk about happening. They say that art is headed towards that direction, that happening is assimilating the arts. I don’t believe in collectivism of art nor in having only one direction in anything. I think it is nice to return to having many different arts, including happening, just as having many flowers...People might say, that we never experience things separately, they are always in fusion and that is why “the happening”, which is a fusion of all sensory perceptions. Yes, I agree, but if that is so, it is all the more reason and challenge to create a sensory experience isolated from other sensory experiences, which is something rare in daily life. Art is not merely a duplication of life. To assimilate art in life, is different from art duplicating life.”</li>
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<li>Goes on to explain that divisions of art do not mean dividing experience; can still use other things to emphasize one sensory experience i.e not just using sound to create music; giving instructions of fire for 10 days to create a vision in someone’s mind.</li>
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<li>“I can just see a Bronxville housewife saying to her guests “do add a circle to my painting before you have a drink”, or a guest saying “I was just admiring your painting by taking the previledge of adding another hole to it”, etc. That is my dream, and something to come very later, I suppose.</li>
<li>“Mirror becomes a razor when it’s broken. / A stick becomes a flute when it’s loved.”</li>
<li>“I wonder why men can get serious at all. They have this delicate long thing hanging outside their bodies, which goes up and down by its own will. First of all having it outside your body is terribly dangerous. If I were a man I would have a fantastic castration complex to a point that I wouldn’t be able to do a thing. Second, the inconsistency of it, like carrying a chance time alarm or something. If I were a man I would always be laughing at myself. Humor is probably something the male of the species discovered through their own anatomy. But men are so serious. Why? Why violence?”</li>
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<li>Why did she do this work? Why did she use body?</li>
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<li>Ability to directly link ideas and images; encourages involvement and thought</li>
<li>Seeing the environment and life through the eyes of an artist</li>
<li>People getting the experience of being an artist, making them part of the piece</li>
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<li>Historical Context</li>
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<li>Active in 50s through 60s</li>
<li>Vietnam War</li>
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<li>Ideas + Theories from reading and discussion</li>
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<li>Similar idea of wanting audience interaction--force the audience to think as the Futurists</li>
<li>Instructions/building an image in the mind, the mind is more important than the physical/makes the physical important</li>
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<ul>
<li>Wack! Art and the Feminist Revolution [BOOK]</li>
<ul>
<li>Created art since mid 1950s, met John Cage and George Brecht, George Maciunas, and La Monte Young (Fluxus)</li>
<li>Worked with Cage’s musical experimentation approach</li>
<li>First to use ‘event scores;’ using language of instruction to conceive a work conceptually with the intention of allowing for multiple iterations and performers.</li>
<li>Less of a theatrical performer; Wack! Book describes as ‘infused with own unique sensibility’</li>
<li>Cut Piece elicited many different reactions</li>
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<li>Japanese audiences were more discreet than those in New York</li>
<li>A man in Kyoto made a motion to stab her, which was ‘disappointing’ because it was too theatrical.</li>
<li>Follows themes of ‘invasion or violation’ themes that pop up in her other work</li>
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<li>Freedom, a film, follows a struggle of her own choice to remove clothing, but when she gets to bra, the film ends, implying an ongoing struggle/unresolved</li>
<li>When asked about works being gendered through appearance of female subject, maintains idea that struggles are not limited to women. “Making art is a feminine activity in the world as compared to other activities. When i say that art is a feminine activity I don’t necessarily mean that it is an activity for women, I’m talking about the feminine quality in us, which could be seen in men and women in various degrees.”</li>
</ul>
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<ul>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdZ9weP5i68">Voice Piece for Sopranos</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AimU35Qoceg">Video of Performance with Lady GaGa</a></li>
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<li>Sings like this out of choice, memory of hearing a woman scream while giving birth.</li>
<ul>
<li>“that experience stayed with me. And I thought: why is woman always known for pretty voice and pretty songs? Because that’s what the world wants. They don’t want a woman to sound too strong. We feel we shouldn’t scream out. So I thought we have to show what women are, we’re the birthgivers of the human race.”</li>
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<li>Wanted to be disruptive and provactive</li>
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BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-6348098595109077882016-04-17T22:26:00.000-07:002016-04-26T21:29:00.419-07:00Project #1 "Slide" aka My First Performance Art Piece<br class="Apple-interchange-newline" />
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<b><span style="font-size: x-large;">PROJECT #1 "SLIDE"</span></b></div>
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<span class="s1">One of my quirks and issues is that I have a complex about my body. I hate it. I think that I have the most disgusting and off-putting lumpy hairy bodies in the world. And I often feel that my body is non-reflective of who I am as a person—that I feel trapped and confined in this completely unglamorous meat cage. I am loudly and proudly team body image issues. So a lot of what I like to do as a performer and now as an artist involves taking this horrible meat prison and adorning it with tinsel and sequins to make it sparkly and beautiful.</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">lol this guy caught RED HANDED</td></tr>
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<span class="s1">The other thing that I like is going to back to childhood and innocence and placing activities or objects that are charged with innocence and nostalgia in a space to be interacted with and viewed by the audience. So the idea of slide—a kids hand game that I remember from elementary school became the thing that I fixated on for this first piece.</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">aw, twinning.</td></tr>
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<span class="s1">My initial image was to make the body or artist beautiful by applying paint, and this paint became applied in the childlike innocence and splattering that came from the hand clap game of slide. In a way the struggles and insecurities we gain with age would disintegrate with revival of childhood tradition. This first performance of “Slide” tested that theory and began to walk in that direction, but it needed more. The sound was very satisfying and the effect of having us sitting as living sculpture was very effective. I liked the portrayal of the idea of the artist as art. However we needed more paint or more substances. I think that with every “screw-up” or miscommunication of the game, we should have broke to apply more substance. Also, instead of keeping our substances in small containers, placing them in buckets to pick-up or on a plate or pallet would make it easier than pouring the peanut-butter or squeezing the paint out of the tube.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Well officers, this isn't what it looks like.</td></tr>
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I liked the peanut butter but it easily disappeared into the paint. It changed the consistency of the final substance and this final substance appeared relatively early into the piece. I wonder how the performance would have changed with more application of substance or in variance of substance. A bucket or pallet could definetly leave some splatter and residue on our paper.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">the residue</td></tr>
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BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-32898943619083024202016-04-16T10:45:00.002-07:002016-04-26T20:58:06.092-07:00Hard DecisionsThe past two months I've been working on a devised production of a show called Those That Fall; a play about a small town in Iowa that is changed forever when the story of an 8-foot bat begins to circulate throughout the town and into the rest of the country. There are some blatant displays of racism and sexism and classism in the piece. And unfortunately, it's a timely piece, coming at a time when the school seems to need it the most.<br />
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The past week, pro-Trump supporters have gotten louder and began placing larger displays of his hateful dogma. And as a result, tensions on campus have elevated. Anti-Trump groups and groups of people of color, especially the Union Latinx group, have escalated efforts and the campus is a battleground of 'free speech vs hate speech' and how to make sure that diversity is encouraged--how to make Cornell a safe space for students of color. To top it all of, a group of students who were caught underage drinking and under the influence of marijuana (illegal and Iowa and normally punished severely) that were harassing a group of students of color and telling them to get back where they came from didn't face any repercussions publicly. As far as I know, they got off scot-free because they were student athletes. That doesn't make me feel safe. If student athletes are kept safe from repercussions, what's to stop them from getting ballsier and making more violent attacks. What if other students see this as a chance to fight back against 'liberal oppression.'</div>
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I'm not sure if I truly count as a person of color. Asian American are largely ignored when it comes to things. But we exist--and I'm technically and Asian American student. My father is Chinese. My mother, on the other hand is white. Which makes me a blend, a mixed race student--and that in and of itself is a whole other barrel of monkeys. But I do know that I don't feel safe on this campus as a nonbinary gay mixed Asian student. And working late nights at rehearsal and then walking back to me dorm, despite how close I live is scary.</div>
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Last night at rehearsal, the director, Janeve West, gave us the option to decide not to do the show. If there was too much at stake, if the flack that would come back to us was too much, we could end it here. And I'm sad to say that my first answer was "No, I don't want to do this show." It's not so much that I'm afraid of repercussions. Honestly, I don't think this is the show that will bring change. I don't think the person that need to see this show will see it. But I do know that I am very stressed right now. There's the natural block stress and the fact that devising is stressful. I can handle that. I knew that was coming. But I hadn't anticipated the stress of a campus where I feel unsafe to walk around at night; where I'm not sure I trust campus safety to protect me. And so I wanted to say "I can't do this show. Not right now. Not like this." But at the same time, I have family coming to see this show. This is my first mainstage show. And I can't be blacklisted as that guy who couldn't handle the stress of production. So I didn't say anything. I'm going to do this show. I already signed a contract.</div>
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A comment was made against me in the past that maybe I wasn't emotionally stable or capable of doing a hard or intense production. I am capable. Things are hard and I always power through them. I'm a goddamn fighter.</div>
BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-11788755480711476132016-04-14T09:06:00.001-07:002016-04-26T20:58:14.036-07:002 Cute Chicks Cuddle on Sawdust<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Today we didn't have class; instead there were sessions in the technology center with Brooke. Unfortunately, our campus is plagued by Trump supporters and the climate on campus is tense and charged--it seems like we're primed for some kind of explosion. I ended up sleeping in--no thanks 2 u stress and Those That Fall--but I got to class in time to film for our playing with Adobe Premier, software that I used in my last class, Film Studies.<br />
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One of the librarians brought in her two baby chicks, and Brooke had us use anything in the library for our video source. Because baby animals make everything better and everyone needs everything made better right now, I took shots of the chicks. And put them together in this hot mess of a bad meme.<br />
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The name comes was inspired by bad objectifying porno titles and was meant to misrepresent the piece. The song comes from the fact that I wanted something about this to be more ridiculous than cute. And the annoyance contrasts nicely with the cuteness.<br />
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Enjoy <i>"Two Cute Chicks Cuddle on Sawdust."</i><br />
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<i>EDIT: I had to upload this on YouTube. I've become 2010 Internet meme trash.</i>BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690058647185032056.post-57899435372257920572016-04-12T07:21:00.000-07:002016-04-26T20:58:19.153-07:00Welcome to IntermediaThis is the start of an exciting new adventure to me--a brief foray into performance art. In block 8 of my Sophomore year at Cornell College, I'm taking an Intermedia class. Part of that class is to have a blog; hence this blog--because my professional Wordpress wasn't going to work. This is going to be a weird and ridiculous introductory post.<br />
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It's going to be exciting to use this new platform and to play with it to figure out what it can do. I'm also excited to discover what performance art is, and where I fall stylistically.BKDubshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01689552039776325420noreply@blogger.com0